![ONE campaign](http://<a href="http://www.one.org/"><img src="http://action.one.org/media/banners/ONE_logo_treatments.gif"){kind=link}
the last two days have been frustrating. my tooth hurts and i have been "slowing." usually that "slowing" feeling means that depression land is creeping around the next bend. as i was pondering my lack of motivation, i realized that it was this time last year that i put in my resignation at christ church. i was in the land of pain last year in october. i was fried, i was admitting my workaholism, and i'd lost my creative passion. my priest, roger, was very gracious and listened to my ramblings and my desparation. he allowed me to take most of november off. i went to michigan and looked at the water, wrote, worked puzzles and talked to god. i returned to work in december and officially left jan. 1st.
i really believe that i did the best thing for my family and for my emotional health. and god opened lots of doors for me after i jumped out of the safety of my boat at christ church glendale.
this year's been a gift and good for me,
but not great for my check book...
so i'm back in the job hunt...
and the question is what is next in the big adventure of life in the kingdom?
i don't fit in most churches...not everyone wants a "sacred ritualist" (as mark scandrette has named me)
and most folks looking
for a worship arts pastor are really looking for someone who plays guitar or keyboards and
leads singing.
i miss teaching
i miss working with students
i really want a community that wants to create...to bring the word to life and live out the kingdom.
i'd love to be with folks who want and actually need my gifts.
do i plant something?
do i just go work at starbucks?
i actually have thought about working at "hot topic"...i think i can get out of the orange and into some black...and just spike my hair a little bit more. what better place to be to help folks see the kingdom?
do you think i could get away with wearing my "jesus loves pedro" or my "seek justice" t-shirts?
anyway...i'd love your prayers for the next thing. and if you know of anyone looking to hire let me know. and hopefully tomorrow will be more productive.
praying for you Lilly...
Posted by: KC | October 27, 2005 at 05:24 PM
let's have lunch.
Posted by: aaron | October 27, 2005 at 06:07 PM
Well I think Hot Topic has it all. I got my Napoleon Dynamite wig there. Neat place. And yes, Jesus does love Pedro....
Posted by: Dan-Monastic Skete | October 27, 2005 at 11:45 PM
What a privilege to pray for you!
Posted by: Tammy Jo | October 28, 2005 at 02:49 AM
We should talk more about this. I think I understand how you feel. Although I am in school, I feel ya. Don't forget that you're going to make it.
Posted by: Shane | October 28, 2005 at 05:21 AM
Hugs and prayers that things become clearer soon. Late October is a difficult time of year at its best, imo.
Posted by: Kathryn | October 28, 2005 at 08:47 AM
as someone who does play guitar and lead singing yet sees a little bit of where the kingdom is headed (hopefully, if we can get out of our 'worship is music' rut), i sometimes find myself wishing my gifts were more like yours or lori's...
i think you'll find a great place to serve... trust Him, and He'll lead you... i'll be praying for you in this season!
Posted by: Candyce | October 28, 2005 at 03:01 PM
Prayed for you today Lilly.
Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight
-Proverbs 3:5-6
Posted by: Brian | October 28, 2005 at 04:43 PM
I am going through a rough time with my job as well. I can feel your pain right now. I am praying for you Lilly. Hang in there!
Posted by: Jillian | October 29, 2005 at 04:05 AM